Simplifying Valentine's day

Hubby and I have decided that we are not going to celebrate Valentine's Day this year, or maybe ever again. Why? Well, putting it bluntly, we don't need to.

This weekend hubby and I will do the same thing as every weekend. No, not plan to take over the world! We will plan a nice meal to cook together and eat together as a family. Actually, Missy won't be here this weekend so it'll be just the two of us. We will likely go out somewhere for a drive or a walk together (weather and health pending that day) and we like to bake a cake together. Later we will curl up on the sofa with the lights low and watch a movie, or maybe play a board game. It is winter after all.

All the family together on our Honeymoon

Sounds cosy right? And it is. Hubby even put up fairy lights for me to make it more cosy for winter. The big thing here is that we do this most weekends (and often in the week) so we don't need a special day. Every day is special for us.

I am very lucky to have a wonderfully caring and romantic hubby. He does very unromantically romantic things for me (as I do for him). He looks after my needs without me having to ask, often before I even know I have them. He brings me a cup of tea in the mornings because he knows it's the most difficult time of day for me. He takes over the cooking when he can see I'm tired. He might need instructions on how to finish whatever random dish I've concocted but I'm sat down with a cuppa while he does the work. If he's having a tough day in work I will try to make one of his favourite dishes for dinner for when he gets home. Nothing soothes him like a homecooked meal, a maybe a glass of wine or two.

The way to my man's heart.
Look at that face!

We tell each other every day that we love each other. We also tell Missy every day. We don't say it to hear it back or to use as a tool, but just because we want the other person to know. We will quietly hold each others' hands anytime, anywhere, just to re-enforce that we are here for each other. We cwtch (hug) often without needing to say a word. We will sometimes text the other in the day just to say that we miss them. We are very tactile as a couple and I love it.

These little actions speak far louder than a card and a bunch of store bought flowers one day a year. I hate the feeling of obligation that we must buy something just because society sees it as the thing to do. Really, it's another heavily marketed day, like Mother's Day, Father's Day, *insert random occasion* Day just for businesses to try to prise money from us.

Here's the thing though, love and contentment can't be bought but they are free to give. These are things that build over time together when you do the little things for each other. Hubby offering me (or vice versa) his last sweet means so much more than a gift on a day that has been constructed on feelings of guilt if you don't go along with the crowd. The little things that we do, but don't have to do, for each other every day are the true expressions of love.

Family meal time after cooking together

For years I've been trying to cut down on our consumerism. It's slowly drowning me in stuff and it most certainly does not bring happiness, just more stress over where to keep things that you probably don't even want. I simply don't need or want any more stuff. Material possessions have never meant much to me so they are not special to me.

The best gift for me this Valentine's Day is to not buy (see what I did there!) into it but to look for the special things in every day instead. Not to mention that the money saved can go towards things that are important to us, like our family holiday or experiences together. In years to come, I will remember our trips to France together or the shows that we went to see together, but I won't remember each individual bunch of roses I might receive. Hubby is my Valentine every day and I love him for it.